The following is a blog post that I did for another site, but feel it is appropriate for this month. I am facing the anniversary of my Mom’s death as well as having several friends who are going through equally hard times.
August 29, 2014
Seven months had passed since I had lost my mother in an unexpected manner and today was the one I had chosen to celebrate her beautiful life. A gathering of family and friends that were dear to her, in a place that positively captured her heart.
The Celebration of Life was held on a village green nestled between a harbor filled with boats and rows of cute little vacation cottages. The same cottages that she had spent a couple of summers renting. It was mid July and the Maine weather was truly a joy: a few clouds, a comfortable temperature and a breeze that beckoned everyone to enjoy summer. The ceremony was very simple and filled with things that Mom would have loved: music, the ocean, family and a feeling of love.
At the end, I felt the sadness I couldn’t avoid, but also a sense of peace that Mom would have more than approved. She would have loved to go out on the sailboat after and that’s part of what made the day more wonderful.
Several of my family members went for an afternoon cruise including my aunt, (Mom’s youngest sister) whom had never been sailing. It always gives me a profound joy to take someone sailing that has never been. I love to see their look of wonder and enjoyment, because it’s the same way I feel every time I am on the ocean. My whole life has been filled with sailing and the ocean. I don’t ever feel completely at peace or at home unless it is nearby. My earliest memories involve the water. The ocean is such an integral part to our family that I don’t think any of us would be able to live happily without it. I remember once my step mother saying about my Dad, “You can take the boy out of the ocean, but you can’t take the ocean out of the boy.”
And as we took to the Penobscot Bay, it was with great joy that we could all be together. My aunt and I put some of my Mom’s and my step father’s ashes into the water along with some blessed flowers. I know deep within my heart that Mom would have found that appropriate. The rest of the afternoon was spent enjoying the good company, capturing wonderful pictures and relaxing. Thankfully there were more laughs than tears and my aunt said to me that it was one of the best days she had had in a long time. I won’t ever truly say goodbye to my Mom, but this was a good way to move past the sadness, hurt and anger that I had experienced.